Elizabeth, Wikipedia, Araluen and The Life Aquatic

Back to blogging, then. I hope your weekend was good. Mine was very enjoyable, albeit lacking in sleep. Hope y'all are enjoying reading what I'm writing.

Onwards to blog.

Before I even start here, I want you to be amazed by my Technicolor Elizabeths.

Done? Good.

Queen Elizabeth II is a pretty interesting woman, if you ask me. It must be freaky to wake up each morning and realise that you're the most powerful woman in the world.

Here's some info about her, courtesy of Wikipedia. She was born in 1926 (which makes her 84), and she's been Queen for well over 58 years of her life. She's married to Prince Philip, and together they have three sons and a daughter.

She has kids with Philip. They got jiggy wit' it. I wonder if she stays powerful in the bedroom.

"WHO'S THE QUEEN?!"

"YOU ARE, BABY, YOU ARE!"

So we all know that the internet only exists as an excuse for Wikipedia. Wikipedia will be mine bride.

I assume everybody else is like me and just sits down for hours to read pages and pages of information, opening a new tab for each link you click so you don't "lose track". Of course that means that in the end you have about 78 tabs open, displaying a step-by-step trail of links from Triceratops through to Private Employment Agencies Convention, 1997.

Here's a fun game to play on Wikipedia.

SIX LINKS TO JESUS

1. Click on Random Page in the Wikipedia side panel.
2. Clicking on six blue inter-page links, find your way to Jesus. (Links between sections on the same page do not count towards your limit of six.)

• Note that Six Links to Jesus will quickly become simple as you develop a strategy. I suggest challenging yourself with other notable individuals such as Einstein, Mother Teresa and Britney Spears.

I went to Araluen Botanic Park this weekend. If you're scratching your head because you've got dandruff, use a moisturising shampoo. If you're scratching your head because you don't know what Araluen is, then you may know it better as the place where all the tulips are every spring.

It's not spring, but believe it or not they keep the garden pretty all year round. It's not too far out of Perth, and the drive to the park includes some very pretty scenery, especially right now.

I journeyed there with friends to enjoy a picnic and a game of croquet. The picnic was delicious, but ball games are not allowed in the park. I suggest that on your visit you plan activities which are not prohibited, as I ended up squashing oranges with my bear hands and trying to imbibe any juice which was released.

I also suggest that you don't squash oranges with your bear hands and try to imbibe any juice which is realised, as both your sleeves and face will end up sticky and sweet.

So you might have heard of Wes Anderson. He's directed a bunch of films, most recently Fantastic Mister Fox. His films are all a little offbeat and left-of-centre, with a very distinct visual style which I love.

His film The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou is a little hard to explain. The protagonist Steve is an oceanographer and documentary filmmaker whose career is slowly fading into obsolescence. On his most recent expedition, Steve's long-time colleague and best friend, Esteban, was eaten by an unknown animal Steve calls the "Jaguar Shark". Steve plans and commences a new expedition to find the shark and exact his revenge.

"That's an endangered species at most. What would be the scientific purpose of killing it?"

"Revenge."

I really enjoyed this film, and I've watched it several times. The characters are brilliant, and the actors do a great job too. Bill Murray is excellent as Steve, and I don't think I've ever disliked anything Anjelica Houston has done in her life.

Watch for a good night of entertainment.